In the journey of life, we often encounter various challenges that test our emotional resilience (the ability to recover from hard times) and mental health. Whether it’s stress from work, relationship issues, or personal hardships, having a toolbox full of effective coping skills can make all the difference.
In this post, I aim to equip you with 10 great skills and practices to add into your life. As you read on, you will explore 10 essential coping skills that can help you navigate through life’s ups and downs with grace.
Each skill comes with straightforward instructions, ensuring you can apply them to your life immediately. There are more in depth versions of each of these. For now, simple is best when you first start out. When you are in a stressed out or dysregulated state, you will want a simple skill that you can use quickly to bring you back down and ground you, as I call it in therapy.
1. Mindful Breathing
Instructions:
- Find a quiet, comfortable place to sit or lie down.
- Close your eyes and take a slow, deep breath through your nose, filling your lungs completely.
- Hold your breath for a moment.
- Exhale slowly through your mouth, letting go of tension.
- Repeat for a few minutes, focusing solely on your breath.
Slow breathing is super important here! Do not breathe too quickly during this exercise, or you will lead your brain to think it needs to be stressed.
Imagine a square, which has 4 sides. Breathe in for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds, breathe out for 4 seconds, and pause for 4 seconds. Do these steps 4 times. It’s as simple as that!
2. Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)
Instructions:
- Sit or lie down in a comfortable position.
- Starting with your feet, tense the muscles as tightly as you can for about 5 seconds. DO NOT TENSE SO HARD THAT IT HURTS.
- Relax the muscles and notice the difference you feel compared to the tension you were feeling moments ago.
- Work your way up the body, tensing and relaxing each muscle group. Start with your feet, then move to your legs, stomach, hands, arms, and your face.
This exercise is fantastic to use at night before you go to sleep, it helps reduce your stress and get the cortisol (the stress hormone) out of your body to help you fall asleep.
3. Journaling
Instructions:
- Choose a time of day when you can write without interruption. I recommend to my clients to use what I call, anchor points. For example, the morning when you wake up, or at night before you go to sleep.
- Start by writing about your day or any thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing. It doesn’t matter what it is, just start writing! Your brain will guide you as it needs.
- Don’t worry about grammar or spelling; focus on expressing yourself.
- Aim for consistency rather than length of your entries.
4. Nature Walks
Instructions:
- Find a green space where you can walk comfortably. Maybe a park, or a local state park.
- Leave your phone and distractions behind.
- Pay attention to the sights, sounds, and smells around you. Take it all in.
- Walk at a pace that feels comfortable, letting your mind wander freely.
5. Mindfulness Meditation
Instructions:
- Find a quiet and comfortable spot.
- Sit in a comfortable position with your eyes closed.
- Focus on your breath, observing each inhalation and exhalation without judgment.
- When your mind wanders, gently bring your focus back to your breath.
6. Social Support
Instructions:
- Identify friends, family members, or colleagues you trust and feel comfortable with.
- Reach out to them for a conversation, a coffee, or a walk.
- Be open about your feelings, but also listen to their experiences and thoughts.
- Cultivate these relationships regularly, not just in times of need.
Friendships, or just having a few people to lean on can make all of the difference in your life.
7. Physical Activity
Instructions:
- Choose an activity you enjoy, such as walking, running, cycling, or yoga.
- Set realistic goals for yourself, starting with as little as 10 minutes a day.
- Gradually increase the intensity and duration as you become more comfortable.
- Notice how your mood changes before and after the activity.
Working out in any way is very beneficial to both your mental health and physical health. If you add exercise into your day, you will probably sleep better at night.
8. Creative Expression
Instructions:
- Pick a form of creative expression that appeals to you, like drawing, painting, writing music, or crafting. Or anything that suits your interests.
- Set aside dedicated time to engage in this activity without any distractions. 5 to 15 minutes is great if you are just starting out. Just START!
- Let go of judgments about the outcome; focus on the process of creation.
- Use this time to express emotions or experiences that are hard to articulate verbally.
9. Gratitude Practice
Instructions:
- Every day, write down three things you are grateful for.
- Be specific about each item, and try to notice new things each day.
- Reflect on why these things matter to you.
- Over time, observe any shifts in your attitude and outlook on life.
By doing this, you will begin to turn your brain’s thinking into a more positive style.
10. Setting Boundaries
Instructions:
- Reflect on your limits in various aspects of your life, such as work, relationships, and personal time.
- Communicate these boundaries clearly and respectfully to others.
- Practice saying “no” to requests that infringe on your boundaries. This is fun to practice with friends or family.
- Adjust your boundaries as needed, recognizing that they may change over time.